What do you get when you cross a dog and a frog?
A Croaker Spaniel.
Mistakes happen.
No need to terrier-self up about it.
Why couldn’t the dog fit in his clothes?
He was a little husky
My dog went on his first date.
But she was a mal-TEASE.
What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel and a terrier?
A hot-diggity-dog.
Why did the firefighters bring a dog along with them?
To help them find the nearest fire hydrant.
What do dogs eat for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
I recently got two German Shepherds. Because
I wanted some paw-dy guards.
How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?
Konnichihuahua.
My neighbor had way too many dogs.
It’s safe to say that he had a Rover-dose.
Why do dogs run in circles?
Because it’s hard to run in a square.
Why don’t dogs bark at their feet?
It isn’t polite to talk back to your paw.
What is the poshest breed of dog?
A Cavalier King Charles Spaniel.
Why did the Dalmatian have to go to the eye doctor?
He kept seeing spots.
As long as your dog sticks by your side.
Anything is paw-sible.
My dog needed date ideas.
I told him to whine and dine her.
What did the dog say when he had a bad day?
Today has been ruff.
What was Muhammad Ali’s favorite breed of dog?
A boxer.
What did the Golden Retriever say to the beautiful poodle?
You’re looking very fetching.
What do you call a veterinarian that specializes in canines?
A dogtor.
What do you call a cold dog?
A pup-sicle. Better steer clear, especially if he’s fur-ocious… don’t want him to give you frost-bite.
How do you know when your dog is lazy?
When it chases parked cars.
What happens when you cross an Australian dog and a Beatle?
Dingo Starr.
What is a dog’s favorite book?
Harry Paw-ter and the Sorcerer’s Bone.
What’s a dog’s favorite condiment?
Fetch-up.
I nearly kicked my dog out, but we renegotiated the terms of his leash.
What type of dog would be the best at portraying Tina Turner?
An Angela Bassett Hound.
Why are Dalmatians so bad at hiding?
Because they are always spotted.
What is a dog’s favorite movie series?
Fifty shades of Greyhound.
Have you ever heard of Pavlov’s dog?
Yeah, he rings a bell
What did one flea say to the other?
Shall we walk, or shall we take the dog?
What dog does Dracula own?
A blood-hound.
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
What do you call a dog who can fight?
A Boxer.
Why do Dachshunds nap in the sun?
Because they’re hot dogs.
Why did the dog fail his driving test?
Because he couldn’t parallel bark.
What did the dog order at a restaurant?
His owner’s homework.
What is a dog’s favorite pick-up line?
You must be my backyard… because I dig you
What do you call someone who always takes pictures of their dog?
A pup-arazzi.
What did Shakespeare say when he was angry with his Dalmatian?
Out, out, damned spot.
What is a dog’s favorite type of homework?
A lab report.
What kind of dog loves bubble baths?
A shampoodle.
What do you call dogs that look exactly the same?
Dogglegangers.
What do dogs have that no other animal has?
Puppies.
My dog recently joined a gang. Now he’s all about that pug-life.
My dog won’t get off the PlayStation He’s been playing Fi-fur all day.
What do you get when you cross a dog with a calculator?
A friend you can count on.
What did the Dalmatian say when he finished his meal?
That really hit the spot.
Sorry we missed puppy class.
My dog was wagging. There goes his oppawtunity for pawfect attendance…
Whenever I go to a zoo, I only ever see dogs.
They were Shiht-zus.
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