Q. What did Ena say after Bambi was killed by a semi truck?
A. He will be dearly missed.
Q. Which kind of deer has a serious drinking problem?
A. The elk-oholic.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
Q. Which kind of cheese is made fom deer milk?
A. Moose-erella.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q. What do you call the stench that comes from antlered roadkill?
A. A foul o-deer.
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
How do you spot a deer behind you? With hind-sight!
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
Q. What did the doe say to the louse on her new baby fawn?
A. Gosh deer nit!
What do you get when you cross a fawn with a bumblebee?
Bambee.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
Q. Which doe did all the stags and bucks sing about in the 1960s?
A. Deer Prudence.
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
Q. What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
Q. How do you describe the inate behavior of a new mother deer?
A. Doe-ting
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
What did the disappointed deer say? Oh deer!
What did the married deer couple say to each other? I love you deer-ly!
Did Rudolph go to school?
No, he was elf taught!
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
Q. What is another name for elk diarrhea?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What do you call an eyeless deer?
No-eye-deer.
What did the deer say to her friend when she needed assistance?
“Could you doe me a favour?”
How do you let a deer know you like her?
You fawn over her.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
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