I love you and I ain’t lion.
Some bunny loves you.
Do you ever wake up, kiss the person beside you and feel glad you are alive?
I just did and apparently I will not be allowed on this airline again!
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
You're my purr-son.
My gay lover asked me if date night was optional.
I said no, it's a mandate
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
You are the coffee to my espresso and I love you a latte.
I started dating her when she backed her car into mine at the mall.
I guess you could say we totally met by accident.
When a gardener asks you how much you love them, you could try the effective – I love you from my head to-ma-toes.
"I lava you."
If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
Its ok to kiss a nun....
But don't get into the habit.
I think you’re incredi-bowl.
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
Being in love is a lot like central heating in your home.
You turn it on just before your guests come over and pretend that your house is always like this.
I’m soy
into you.
-
One thing you never want to do is divorce a butcher.
That would be a huge missed steak.
What’s green and mean and stabs you when you hug it?
Cactus
You make miso happy.
I don’t know about you, but I think helicopter rescue pilots have the best pick-up lines.
What did the astronaut’s fiancé say when he proposed to her in open outer space? She said, “I can’t breathe!”
Why is it always easy for vampires to find their better halves?
Because it’s always love at first bite.
What do you get when you kiss a diseased bird?
Cherpies, but don't worry.
It's tweetable.
My wife and were on the sofa and I lean in for a cuddle.
She says: "careful I'm holding a tea!"
And I say: "and I'm holding you, so I guess we're both holding letters of the alphabet"
Or maybe it’s baseball players because they’re so great at hitting it off.
I feel thankful for having you as my gym buddy and lover.
Our relationship is really working out.
You octopi my thoughts.
I love you berry much.
You are like my dentures.
I cannot smile without you.
I like you sow much.
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?
I'm reading a romance book in Braille.
I don't think I'll finish. It's too touchy feely for me.
Which sea creature gives the best hugs?
A cuttlefish
You will always have
a pizza of my heart.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
Why do painters always fall for their models?
Because they love them with all of their art.
We bee-long together.
when I’m with you.
What did the lighter color shade tell to its dark lover?
I want hue
I’m o-fish-ally in love with you.
There might be other fish in the sea, but you’re my sole mate
What did the patient with the broken leg say to their doctor?
Hey doc, I have a crutch on you.
I loaf you a lot.
Let’s go to bread.
You’re udder-ly perfect.
Now I know why people love footballers – especially the goalies, they are real keepers.
What do you call a person who illegally delivers hugs from country to country?
An international snuggler
What sound do hedgehogs make when they kiss?
Ouch
Why should you never break up with a goalie?
Because he is a keeper!
Let’s commit the perfect crime together.
I’ll steal your heart and you can steal mine.
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