What do you call a cold werewolf?
A chilli dog.
Where do zombie monkeys live?
In the brain forest.
What do you call a half man half horse in the middle of an army formation?
The centaur of attention.
What happened to the skeleton who sat by the fire for too long?
He became bone dry.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
How did the skeletons make s’mores when they went camping?
They made them on the bone-fire.
Why aren't there more Bigfoot jokes?
There are, but they're really hard to find!
What was the skeleton’s favorite Christmas candy?
Bone-bone.
What did the witch say to people who visited her house?
Come sit for a spell!
What did the zombie call the girl he was dating?
His ghoul-friend.
Witch doctors write their prescriptions in curse-ive.
I just found out my Husband is a Ghost. I realised the moment he walked through the door.
How did the witch invite the wizard to take an evening ride on her broomstick?
Voodoo like to ride with me?
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi
What did the Turkey wear on Halloween?
He was a goblin.
What did the minotaur say to the real estate agent?
- Amazing.
If you think Earth has too few human-animal hybrids, then it behooves you to become a centaur.
I heard Medusa looked really pretty.
In fact, her looks were stunning.
You know why vampires can raise ghouls?
Because they are neck romancers!
What type of candy sent the skeleton to the hospital?
Jawbreakers.
Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat the fingers separately.
What kind of chocolate do ghouls like?
Hearse-sheys!
The vampire decided to eat a throat lozenge. It was the only thing he could think of to stop his coffin fit.
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
Why couldn’t the police arrest the skeleton?
They couldn’t pin anything on him.
What do you call a mythical being working in a smoothie store?
Mejuicea.
What is a Ghost’s favourite treat? Ice-scream floats.
I know an old man who's a vampire. He's quite long in the tooth.
At the Italian restaurant, the ghoul ordered spook-ghetti for his main course.
What happens when Bigfoot gets lost in the fog?
He is mist!
When the ghost family got in their car, the dad ghost told the kids to fasten their sheet-belts.
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.
Werewolf Weather Furcast: Tomorrow we expect heavy showers.
What did Dracula say to the priest who visited his castle?
Don’t you ever cross me!
Why did the zombie go crazy?
He had lost his mind.
What do zombies say to their sweethearts?
- I chew-s you.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
What sign was posted in the witches' parking lot?
Violators will be toad.
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
What trees do ghouls like best?
Ceme-trees!
A sphinx was guarding a road when a traveler walked by.
The sphinx said to the man, "You may pass if you can answer my riddle: What is wider than an ocean, heavier than a mountain, and unbounded by the laws of physics?"
The man thought for a moment and answered, "Imagination."
"Wrong," said the Sphinx. "The answer is your mom."
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?
Rigor Mortissen
Which monster did the three bears catch sleeping?
Ghouldilocks!
What kind of jokes do skeletons tell?
Humerus ones.
If I made werewolf puns, they would be howl-arious.
What happened when the werewolf swallowed a clock?
He got ticks.
If you're wondering if someone's become a vampire, there's an easy way to tell. A true vampire is always coffin.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.