What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
How do you let a deer know you like her?
You fawn over her.
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
What is the deer’s favorite food group?
“Deer-y products!”
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
What does the father deer say to the mother deer to show his love?
“I love you deerly!”
Q. What do you call the stench that comes from antlered roadkill?
A. A foul o-deer.
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
What is the difference between a deer nut and a beer nut?
“A beer nut is often more than a buck but a deer nut is always under a buck.”
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
What do you call a deer wearing an explosive vest?
Bombi.
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
What do you get when you cross a fawn with a bumblebee?
Bambee.
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
What type of bread do deers enjoy the most?
“Sour-doe!”
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Q. What did the doe say to the louse on her new baby fawn?
A. Gosh deer nit!
What does a deer say when it prays to the god?
“Deer God!”
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
Why did the deer go for a run?
To doe off some steam.
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
Q. What did Ena say after Bambi was killed by a semi truck?
A. He will be dearly missed.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
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