What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
My two cats had a fight today.
They soon hissed and made up though.
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
Where did the kittens go on a school field trip? To the mewseum
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
What is a cat’s favorite type of bird? An e-mew!
What is a cat’s favorite vegetable? As-purr-agus.
What do kittens wear? Dia-purrs!
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
What is a cat’s favorite kitchen tool? The whisk-er.
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What did the kitten do when she wanted to order something? She looked in the cat-alog!
Did you hear about the cat that ate a ball of yarn? She had a litter of mittens.
Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What do you call a cat that has a hundred legs? A cat-erpillar.
How did the kittens express their love for each other? In Holy Catrimony
What did the happy cat say? Stay paw-sitive!
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo? A stripy jumper!
What sport does a cat play? Hairball!
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs.
What happened to the vet that was accused of negligence? They were sued for meow-practice
Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
What is a cat’s favorite deal? Buy one, get one furry.
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
What happens to great actors? They get nominated for an a-cat-emy award!
What is a cat’s favorite game to play with a mouse? Catch!
What’s the difference between a comma and a cat?
One has the paws before the claws, the other has the clause before the pause.
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
What does a cat wear to stop smelling? Antipurrspirant!
What did Spock say to his cat? Live long and paw-sper.
What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread