Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
Q. Which deer prison is escape proof?
A. Elk-atraz.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
What is the most affordable type of meat that we would purchase?
“Dear balls because they are always under a buck.”
What was the motto of the unique deer? Deer to be different!
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
Q. What did the doe say to the louse on her new baby fawn?
A. Gosh deer nit!
What did the large baby deer say when he met his favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn!”
What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
How do you spot a deer behind you? With hind-sight!
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
Q. What do you get if you cross a devilish deer with an evil cougar?
A. A hell cat.
Q. Which kind of deer has a serious drinking problem?
A. The elk-oholic.
What is the deer’s favorite food group?
“Deer-y products!”
What did the married deer couple say to each other? I love you deer-ly!
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
Q. Which doe did all the stags and bucks sing about in the 1960s?
A. Deer Prudence.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What does the father deer say to the mother deer to show his love?
“I love you deerly!”
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
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