What did the scientist’s cat say? I think I’ve lost an electron, I’m pawsitive!
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
Where do kittens learn to move around? On the catwalk
Why are cats scared of trees?
Because of their bark.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
What is a cat’s favorite class at school? Hiss-tory!
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
What did the kitten do when she wanted to order something? She looked in the cat-alog!
Why do cats not laugh at jokes? They take things too litter-ally.
Where did the kittens go on a school field trip? To the mewseum
What sport does a cat play? Hairball!
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
My two cats had a fight today.
They soon hissed and made up though.
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
What do you call a cat that gets what they want? Purr-suasive.
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
Why did the cat invest in the stock market? He thought is was a good op-paw-tunity
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.
What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What is a cat’s favorite deal? Buy one, get one furry.
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
What do cats read in the morning? The mewspaper!
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What is a cat’s favorite TV show? The evening mews.
What happened to the vet that was accused of negligence? They were sued for meow-practice
Where did the independent cat decide to live? In Catalonia!
What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
Why couldn’t the dog say, “Ahhh”?
Because the cat got his tongue.
What’s the difference between a comma and a cat?
One has the paws before the claws, the other has the clause before the pause.
What kind of cats love to go bowling? Alley cats!
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
What is a cat’s favorite Tom Hanks character? Furrest Gump.
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
What is a cat’s favorite kitchen tool? The whisk-er.
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
Why was the doctor’s favorite patient a cat? Because she has nine lives!
What does a cat say when it gets injured? MeOWWW!
Why was the cat kicked out of the game? They thought she was a cheetah.
What is a cat’s favorite type of water? Purr-ified!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What did Spock say to his cat? Live long and paw-sper.
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
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