Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
What is a bunny’s motto? Don’t be mad, be hoppy!
What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving? The turkey trot
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
Is a mountain goat a hillbilly?
What do you call a Tyrannosaurus under stress?
A nervous rex.
What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
What does a French beaver call his dam? Ma'dame.
He has some good puns on crows, but he doesn’t have to keep crowing about it.
Bee warned.
Bee puns really sting.
What do you get when you cross an alligator and a crocodile.
A funeral.
What did the dog say when he had a bad day?
Today has been ruff.
What do you call a dog that’s been left outside in the cold?
A chili dog.
What’s a shark’s favorite science fiction TV show?
Shark Trek.
Have you ever tried setting fire to a flamingo? It’s really easy, you just burn the O.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
How do you catch a squirrel who's interested in ornithology?
Climb a tree and act like a nuthatch.
What did the first century Christian say about the lion that killed his wife?
I'm Gladiator.
What is small, has a long tail and works with the police?
A gerbil shepherd dog!
I'm going to combine my interests of taxidermy and bomb making
by making you an otter you can't defuse.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account?
They were prime mates.
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
Have you ever heard of the Crows Law Of Energy Conservation?
It's also known as the Law of Caws and Effect.
People always talk about the 'Eye Of The Tiger'. No one talks about the other four letters.
What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air?
A seahorse.
What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
What do you call a nervous baby ant?
A little antsy.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
A guy walks into a crow bar
It's a murder scene
How do bats greet a friend?
With a sound wave.
A bunch of crows ganged up and killed a chicken.
It was a murder most fowl.
How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? it has a blue light.
Knock Knock!
Who is there?
Water.
Water who?
Water your plans for the weekend, Mr Beaver?
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
What do Chinese bears eat for breakfast?
Panda-cakes!
Who granted the fish’s wish?
The fairy cod mother!
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
Did you hear about the aquarium owner?
His shark was worse than his pike.
A sheep, an idiot, and a snake walk into a bar.
Baaaa dumb hisssssss.
Why are flamingos such good patients?
They’re used to wading.
Dear Turkey, don't worry... they only love us for our breasts too. Sincerely, all women.
When is a black dog not a black dog?
When it’s a Greyhound.
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away.
How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow? Down in the mouth.
What did the beaver say to the other beaver? I love you like no otter.
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