What type of dog does Dracula have?
A bloodhound.
What do you call a jellyfish on a plane?
A flightoplankton.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
Flamingo parents are really cute with their babies. You should see them playing Beak a Boo.
What is a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
Why did the dolphin end its own life?
It was missing a porpoise.
What do you call a shark that can’t stop singing “U Cant Touch This?”
An M.C. Hammerhead.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
What’s a rabbit’s favorite game? Hopscotch!
What food did the Gorilla order when he went to France?
Ape Suzettes.
My wife has been giving me a hard time about my drinking. Eventually, I agreed to quit cold turkey.
Never cared for leftovers anyway.
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.
Two snakes parted.
The first one said, “Fangs for the memories”.
What do you call an and with frogs legs?
An antphibian.
Cows wear bells around their necks because it is moooo-sic to the farmer’s ears.
Why are parrots the life of the party? Every day is their bird-day!
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
A bunch of crows ganged up and killed a chicken.
It was a murder most fowl.
What does the mummy parrot say to her baby? Beak-areful!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
When does a Koala go "moo"? When it is learning a new language!
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
Why are crows the safest flying birds?
They're the most CAWtious.
I had to carry a group of crows once.
It was murder on my back!
What does a English turkey say to another English turkey on Thanksgiving morning? "Excuse Me... ahem... To be or not to be roasted, that is the question!"
How do fish get from place to place while playing golf?
With a golf carp,
If you ever own a koala as a pet, make sure you can keep track of it by putting a koalar around its neck.
What was the first car Henry Fordasaurus invented? A Model T-Rex.
Where do koalas go to settle legal matters? A kangaroo court!
How do snails make important calls? On shell phones.
What do you call an otter with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What do you get when you cross a tortoise and a llama?
A turtle-neck sweater.
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
What do you get if you cross a mouse with a Triceratops? Enormous holes in the base boards.
Why was the scarecrow upset with the worm?
It was going ear to ear in the corn field!
Grandma runs the kitchen like a turtle-tarian; give her some space there.
Why was the whale so sad?
The fish was said because he was a Blue whale!
What kind of music do sophisticated frogs listen to?
Hopera.
What's more impressive than a talking fish?
A spelling bee.
Sheep jokes are bad.
Really baaaaaaa-d.
Why did the Dalmatian have to go to the eye doctor?
He kept seeing spots.
What do dogs increase?
The pup-ulation.
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
Why did the T-Rex get a ticket? He ran through the stomp sign.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
A boy sees an alligator in the zoo and shouts,
“Hey, are you a caiman?”
The alligator replies, “I’m alright, thanks, kid!”
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
What do you call a dinosaur that's a loud sleeper? A Snore-a-sorus
What did the baby rabbit say before his favorite holiday? I carrot wait for the Easter Bunny to visit.
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
Go to BabaMail
