What do you call a monkey that sells potato chips?
A chipmunk.
I asked a pink bird who its favourite artist was. It looked at me strangely and replied “Flamingo Starr, of course.”
What's more amazing than a talking turkey? A spelling bee!
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
What do sloths make when it snows? Slow Angels.
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?
A do-you-think-he-saur-us.
Why do snakes always measure in inches?
Because they don’t have any feet.
What do bees call wasps?
Wanna-bees.
What's a frog's favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What did the deer say after she saw her Amazon bill?
“I spent too much doe!”
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish.
What does a Saudi bee call its bros?
Habibees.
What type of cat lives under the sea? A purr-maid.
What happened to the Easter bunny at school? He was eggspelled.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
What is a cat’s favorite TV show? The evening mews.
Do you know what kind of stock to use when making neotropical near-passerine bird soup?
Doesnt matter, as long as you put Toucans in.
How do you make a duck sing soul music?
Put him in the microwave until his Bill Withers
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
What do you call an illegally parked frog?
Toad.
What did the irritated crow said to his fried?
I won't talk to you if you don’t stop ravening.
Two European frogs discuss their ancestry
"So, are you a complete french frog?"
"No. I'm a tad-pole."
My dyslexia has reached a new owl.
What do you call someone who tells too many dinosaur jokes?
A dino-bore.
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
What did one flea say to the other?
Shall we walk, or shall we take the dog?
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
Q: What does the tiger use to brush his mane?
A: A catacomb.
If a crab worked in a pizza parlor, which station would it work?
The crust station.
Hannibal crossed the Alps because it was safer than crossing the elephants.
What do you call a royal goat wearing denim?
Billy Jean King.
What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
What do you get if you cross a wasp with a doorbell?
A hum-dinger!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
How do clams call their friends?
Clams call their friends on their shell phones!
What do you call a large gorilla who appears to be in a bad mood?
Sir.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
I tried asking some beavers to help me build my house. They didn’t give a dam.
Did you hear about the cat who drank ten bowls of water? It set a new lap record
My sister asked me for some spider puns.
I told her to look them up on the web.
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called SWAT team.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff.
Baa dum tssssss.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
Mistakes happen.
No need to terrier-self up about it.
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