What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
What was the dog’s favorite book?
Winnie the Pooch. He loves to read a lot of story tails before bed.
How do pigs get to the hospital?
In ham-bulances.
Q. What is another name for elk diarrhea?
A. Chocolate Moose.
How will a crow with a cold fever sound like? Caw-ph, Caw-ph.
Did you hear about the cat that ate a ball of yarn? She had a litter of mittens.
What did the seal say to the walrus after dating him for three months?
I think we should sea otter people.
Whale, whale, whale …
If it isn’t a pod.
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
What do you call a cat teacher? A purr-fessor
Where’s a dolphin’s favorite place to drink?
A dive bar!
Why did the sloth get fired from his job?
He would only do the bear minimum.
How do rabbits travel? By hareplane.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
Did you hear about the woman who complained about her rabbit stew? She said there was a hare in her soup.
We were all sturtled by the incoming news.
What kind of books do owls read?
Hoo-dunnits.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
How do you save a drowning otter? Take your foot of its head
Did you hear about the incident at the tiger exhibit?
It was a big cat-astrophe
What are crisp, like milk and go 'eek, eek, eek' when you eat them? Mice Krispies!
What do you get if you cross a squirrel with an elephant?
An animal that remembers where it hid its nuts.
Where do prehistoric reptiles like to go on vacation? To the dino-shore.
What did the beaver say to his girlfriend?
Chew make me feel warm and fuzzy on the inside.
What do cows sing at their friend’s birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo!"
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
Does Mr. Otterton listen to Gazelle? Yes he's a rabid fan.
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Q. What do swine use to chat up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines!
Where do crows type? Crows type on cawmputers.
How does a shark greet a fish?
Pleased to eat you.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
What is serial killer Buffalo Bill's favorite fast food restaurant?
Chick Fillet.
What did the lion say to his cubs when he was first teaching them how to hunt? Don’t cross the road until you see the zebra crossing!
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
What did the Inuit say to to Englishman After he wanted some seal?
"I've got Nunavut."
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
A slow poke is what you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine.
What has 4 wheels and flies?
Garbage truck
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
What’s black and white and goes round and round?
A panda stuck in a revolving door.
Are beavers the best builders in the animal kingdom? Dam right they are.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What do you call a bear with a bad attitude?
The bearer of bad news.
What is a parrot’s favorite game?
Hide and Speak!
What do bees chew?
Bubmble gum.
What did the beaver say to the river? You can run but can't tide.
Why did the tiger visit the eye specialist after dropping a can of red paint on himself? He saw red.
Why was the doctor’s favorite patient a cat? Because she has nine lives!
Go to BabaMail
