Why did the bees go on strike? Because they wanted more honey and shorter working flowers.
What side does the zebra have the most stripes on?
The outside.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
Q: Why did the beaver need an alarm clock?
A: It was to dam early.
A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama?
“Sow what?”
What is a rabbit’s favorite dance? The bunny hop.
How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “G”!
Crows hold grudges. They're also fond of eating the dead. Now...
they've been found to copulate with corpses.
NeCROWphilia.
What did the married deer couple say to each other? I love you deer-ly!
Why did the shark spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open toad sandals.
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish.
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
Why did God create Yogi bear?
Because on his first try he made a Boo-Boo.
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
What do sloths make when it snows? Slow Angels.
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
Bee warned.
Bee puns really sting.
What do you call a polar bear in Florida?
A solar bear.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff.
Baa dum tssssss.
Why don’t oysters share their pearls? Oysters don’t share their pearls because they’re shellfish!
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
Did you hear about the woman who complained about her rabbit stew? She said there was a hare in her soup.
The only things wolves have that no other animal on the face of the earth has are wolf cubs.
What fruit do vampire bats like the best?
Neck-tarines.
Did you hear about the gorilla that was from Vietnam?
He was a viet kong.
I sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellent.
Now it has no friends.
My fat parrot escaped from its cage... To be honest, it's a weight off my shoulders!
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
What is a pink bird's favorite dance? Flamin-tango.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
Did you hear about the two silkworms that were in a race? They wound up in a tie.
A Zebra said to a Lion “Let’s swap roles for a while."
The Lion said “ I’m game!”.
What do bats say to those they dislike? Good riddance to bat rubbish!
What does pooh eat at parties?
Blue bear-y pie.
What did the Mountain lion say to the bathroom attendant?
Out of the way, I’m about to Puma pants!
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
A bunch of crows ganged up and killed a chicken.
It was a murder most fowl.
If you have a parrot, it says a lot about you!
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
What do you call a monkey with a banana in each ear?
Anything you want, he can’t hear you.
What do you call a dinosaur who is elected to Congress? Rep. Tile!
What did the worm say to his friend when he got stuck in pumpkin?
Worm your way out of that one!
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