Q: How does a tiger move a boat?
A: He uses roars.
Who in the hell names their son “Tiger” ?
Only people in the Woods’
Q: What do you call a French guy being mauled by a tiger?
A: Claude.
What happened when the tiger ate the comedian?
He felt funny!
A saber tooth tiger would never blow anything up.
But a dino might.
The tiger ran away from other tigers as they were rude to him. He didn't want to be involved in a catfight.
Our kids tee ball team, the Tigers, won the championship. All the parents were very proud and put in for a little statuette of the front of a tiger to give them to celebrate. When it came in, for some reason it was the back half of a tiger.
Needless to say, it was a cat ass trophy.
What should someone do if they are stuck between a jaguar and a tiger? Simple, just take the Jaguar and drive away from the tiger.
Q: Why did the tiger cross the road?
A: To stop the zebra crossing.
Q: What do tigers and computers have in common?
A: They both have mega bites.
A fight between tiger and lion broke out. Both of them wanted to become the next empe-roar of the jungle.
Why are Siberian tigers so happy at Christmas time? Because it is snowy, and they get to look like white tigers.
What flies around your light at night and can bite your head off?
A tiger moth.
A priest is the best catch for a tiger as they like to prey.
What’s the silliest name you can give a tiger?
Spot.
What animal can go into a tiger’s den and came out alive?
The tiger.
What does a tiger say to his friends before eating a meal? "Let us prey!"
Q: How did the tiger perform during the show?
A: He was a roaring success.
Tigers are bad at basketball because they have only four feet.
The big cat was known around town to wear a lot of funky ties. Everyone called him the tie-ger.
A magician once said he could make a tiger disappear but only transformed it into a tabby cat...
It was a sleight exaggeration.
Why are tigers said to be religious? Because they frequently prey with all their family members.
Scientists transformed a tiger into a horse.
Don't worry, it's in a stable condition.
Why did the tiger eat the tightrope walker?
It wanted a balanced diet.
Q: How does a tiger stop a video?
A: By pressing paws.
What do you get when your cross a bear and a tiger?
A bear and a tiger seeking revenge.
How did the tigers greet the other animals in the jungle? "Hey! Pleased to eat you."
What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?
It’s roar birthday!
Who would win a game of hide and seek between a dalmatian and a tiger? The tiger because he wouldn't be spotted.
If a four-legged animal a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped, what’s a tiger?
Stri-ped.
What do you call a tiger who always gets the same grades as one other person? A tie-ger.
Why should you never do math with a tiger?
If you add 4+4 you're gonna get ate.
Why do tigers always hunt and eat their prey raw?
Because they don’t know how to cook it.
How do you know if a tiger is male or female?
Throw a rock at it. If he runs it's a male. If she runs it's a female.
A rare black tiger is spotted in India
Everywhere else it has stripes.
What’s striped and goes round and round?
A tiger in a revolving door.
If a lamb and tiger were crossed, you would end up with a striped sweater.
A lion would never play golf.
But a Tiger Wood.
Tony the tiger ate both of my grandmother's parents.
Tearfully, I asked him why. He just looked at me and said, "They're GREAT!"
What did the zoologist and the herbalist name their child? Tiger Woods.
Q: What does the tiger use to brush his mane?
A: A catacomb.
A tiger lost a storytelling competition recently as he has only got one tail.
Q: Which U.S. state do tigers like the most?
A: Maine.
Q: How do you stop an angry tiger from charging?
A: Take away his credit cards.
My grandfather had the heart of a tiger
And a lifetime ban at the zoo
How do you know a flmaingo has stolen your shoes?
Only one shoe is missing.
What side of a tiger has the most stripes? The outside.
The tiger asked his longtime friend, "Will you be my tigerlfriend."
Why can't college professors take exams at a zoo? Because there are too many cheetahs.
What would a tiger running a Xerox machine in the back of a store be called? A copycat.
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