Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
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