What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
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