What is a koala’s favorite pop singer? Koala Rae Jepsen. Her most popular song? “Koala Me Maybe”.
How do you apologize to a koala? BEAR your heart and soul.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
Why do you never see koalas wearing shoes? Because they love going bearfoot.
What do you call a koala with a negative attitude? The bearer of bad news.
What do you call a Koala that can pick up an elephant ? Sir!
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
What happened when the koala tripped and fell in a crowded restaurant? He got embearassed.
What’s the scariest koala movie ever made? The Bear Witch Project.
What did the koala radio host say before going on a commercial break? “We’re going to take a small paws for our sponsors.”
What is a koala’s favorite soft drink? Koka-Koala, of course!
Did you hear about the koala bear in the church choir? Yeah, they say he sings bearitone.
What happens when a koala drinks too much alcohol? He gets a bear gut.
What is a koala’s favorite type of fruit? Bearies.
Why did the Koala cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done!
Why did the koala bear eat so much eucalyptus? He simply couldn’t leaf it alone.
What is a koala bear’s favorite mixed drink? A pina koala.
What is a koala’s favorite exercise?
Bearobics.
A star athlete in Koalaville got kicked off the Olympic team for cheating. Unfortunately, he was diskoalafied.
Why don’t koalas like fast food? Because it’s too hard for them to catch.
Why was the koala scientist so well-respected by his peers? He was known for conducting excellent koalatative research.
There once was a koala who could run at a speed of more than 800 miles per hour. He was the first koala to break the sound bearier.
How do you apologize to a koala?
Bear your heart and soul to them.
How do koalas stay in shape? They do bearobics.
How did the little koala bear stop the movie? She hit the paws button.
If you ever own a koala as a pet, make sure you can keep track of it by putting a koalar around its neck.
Where do koalas go to settle legal matters? A kangaroo court!
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
What would you call a dream where a koala bear is eating you? A bite-mare.
When does a Koala go "moo"? When it is learning a new language!
How did the koala bear get the high-paying job? He met all of the koalafications.
I tried to keep a koala in my house, but the smell was just unBEARable.
Was the koala able to complete the grueling 26-mile marathon? Bearly.
How do you know when a baby koala bear is happy? You’ll see them jump for joey!
Why are koala's so sleepy? Because you just got to be tired being so darn cute all day!
Which side of a koala bear has the most fur? The outside!
How does a koala get from one place to another? On a gondkoala.
Besides eucalyptus leaves, what is a koala bear’s favorite vegetable? Koalaflower.
Why didn’t the koala bear get the job? He was underkoalafied. How did he fix this? By going back to koalage.
What is a koala’s favorite Christmas carol? Deck the halls with boughs of holly, koala-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!!!
What does a koala do before making any kind of appointment? He always checks his koalander.
What do you call a koala with no teeth? A gummy bear.
What is a koala bear’s favorite line in the movie “The Sixth Sense”? “Aussie dead people.”
Why isn't the the koala a real bear? He doesn't have the right koalifications.
What do koalas use when they’re doing yard work? A wheelbearow.
What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What’s another popular Christmas song that baby koalas like to sing? “Joey to the World”, of course!
What did the koala write in his Valentine’s Day card to his girlfriend? “I love you-calyptus”.
Why did the manager hire the marsupial? Because he was koala-fied.