How does a koala get from one place to another? On a gondkoala.
What is a koala’s favorite pop singer? Koala Rae Jepsen. Her most popular song? “Koala Me Maybe”.
Why did the manager hire the marsupial? Because he was koala-fied.
How do you apologize to a koala? BEAR your heart and soul.
Why isn't the the koala a real bear? He doesn't have the right koalifications.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
Before the Koalaville basketball team can play for the national championship, they have to make it through the koalafying rounds.
How do you apologize to a koala?
Bear your heart and soul to them.
What do koalas do when they see social injustice happening in the world? They fight for ekoalaty!
Where are koalas taken when they die? To an ancient bearial site.
What is a koala bear’s favorite mixed drink? A pina koala.
What is a koala’s favorite type of fruit? Bearies.
When does a Koala go "moo"? When it is learning a new language!
What do koalas use when they’re doing yard work? A wheelbearow.
Why are koala's so sleepy? Because you just got to be tired being so darn cute all day!
How do koalas stay in shape? They do bearobics.
What happened when the koala tripped and fell in a crowded restaurant? He got embearassed.
Why was the koala scientist so well-respected by his peers? He was known for conducting excellent koalatative research.
How do you know when a baby koala bear is happy? You’ll see them jump for joey!
What did the koala write in his Valentine’s Day card to his girlfriend? “I love you-calyptus”.
There once was a koala who could run at a speed of more than 800 miles per hour. He was the first koala to break the sound bearier.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
Why did the Koala cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done!
What does a koala do before making any kind of appointment? He always checks his koalander.
Where do koalas go to settle legal matters? A kangaroo court!
What do koalas do when they’re facing a tough situation? They grin and bear it.
Why do you never see koalas wearing shoes? Because they love going bearfoot.
Why did the koala get fired from his job?
Because he would only do the bear minimum.
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
What would you call a dream where a koala bear is eating you? A bite-mare.
Why didn’t the koala bear get the job? He was underkoalafied. How did he fix this? By going back to koalage.
What is a koala’s favorite exercise?
Bearobics.
What’s another popular Christmas song that baby koalas like to sing? “Joey to the World”, of course!
What happens when a koala drinks too much alcohol? He gets a bear gut.
What’s small, furry and slightly purple? A koala holding its breath!
I tried to keep a koala in my house, but the smell was just unBEARable.
What do you call a koala with a negative attitude? The bearer of bad news.
Did you hear about the koala bear in the church choir? Yeah, they say he sings bearitone.
How did the little koala bear stop the movie? She hit the paws button.
What’s the scariest koala movie ever made? The Bear Witch Project.
Which side of a koala bear has the most fur? The outside!
If you ever own a koala as a pet, make sure you can keep track of it by putting a koalar around its neck.
What is a koala’s favorite soft drink? Koka-Koala, of course!
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
What happened when the bear applied at the movie theater?
He was told he was not koala-fied.
What is a koala bear’s favorite line in the movie “The Sixth Sense”? “Aussie dead people.”
What do you call a koala with no teeth? A gummy bear.
What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Besides eucalyptus leaves, what is a koala bear’s favorite vegetable? Koalaflower.
What did the koala radio host say before going on a commercial break? “We’re going to take a small paws for our sponsors.”
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