What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
What do you get when you combine a kangaroo with a donkey?
A Kick-Ass
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
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