What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
What do you call a liquid kangaroo?
Marsoupial.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
Today my son drew a picture of a kangaroo without a body.
I couldn't make heads or tails of it.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
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