What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
Today my son drew a picture of a kangaroo without a body.
I couldn't make heads or tails of it.
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What do you call a liquid kangaroo?
Marsoupial.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch