What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
Today my son drew a picture of a kangaroo without a body.
I couldn't make heads or tails of it.
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
What do you call a liquid kangaroo?
Marsoupial.
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
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