What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
How does a horse get a suit fitted?
With a tail-or.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
Why did the horse like her new backpack?
The straps were adju-stable.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
Why are horses so good at the shooting range?
They’re hunters.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
What did the horse reply when asked if it would try water polo?
“I would dapple.”
What natural disaster took out the ancient horses?
A volcanic stirruption.
Why did the horse never get cold?
It was a Dutch warmblood.
What did the teenage horse say when her phone broke?
I canter even.
How does a Pegasus ask her boyfriend to propose?
She says “You’ve got to put a wing on it.”
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
Why did the horse climb Everest?
She liked mount-ains.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it's neck and neck.
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?
A mechanic.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
How did the ponies stay in touch?
C-horse-pondence.
How did the horse make payments?
In in-stallion-ments.
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