What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
What kind of horse do you ride after dark?
A night mare.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
Why did the horse climb Everest?
She liked mount-ains.
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
How did the horse get up the stairs?
He mounted them.
How did the ponies stay in touch?
C-horse-pondence.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
Where do horses get their weaves from?
Mane.
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
How did the horse solve a murder?
Compiled newspaper clippings.
What do you call an explosive horse?
Neigh-palm.
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.
Why did they stop giving the horse grass?
They wanted it to be less green.
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it's neck and neck.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
What is the coldest type of horse?
A freezian.
Beat funny horse puns
What’s a horse’s favorite makeup brand?
Neighhhbelline.
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
What’s happens to the sportiest horse?
It gets to be first horse-pick of the draft.
What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
Why was the pony so excited to be invited to a rally with the president?
It was a huge end-horse-ment.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?
A mechanic.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What’s a horse’s favorite fruit?
Canterlope.
What do you call a horse on a boat attached to land?
Docked.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
Go to BabaMail
