What do you call a gorilla with a million dollars?
A gorillanaire
What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones?
Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Q. Which country was founded by wild gorillas?
A. The Banana Republic.
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
Q. Why doesn't a big gorilla have to flush the toilet?
A. He scares the sh*t out of it!
If you were in the jungle, and a gorilla charged you, what should you do?
Pay him.
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
Why do gorillas have really big fingers?
Because they have really big nostrils!
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Why did the gorilla cross the road? He had to take care of some monkey business.
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
Did you hear about the gorilla that was from Vietnam?
He was a viet kong.
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
What do you call a gorilla with no arms?
An ape-utee
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
Q. Why was the baby gorilla such a big brat?
A. Because his parents are big apes.
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
Q. Which kind of ape enjoys smoking tobaco?
A. Cigarilla.
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
Q. What do gorillas and big apes do to make each other laugh?
A. They tell punny jokes about humans!
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