How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
Why did the advertising tycoons hire a bunch of apes?
They were running a gorilla marketing campaign.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
Q. What do you call a gorilla who studies large primates and has great grades?
A. Ape lust student.
What did the Gorilla say when he saw there was a sale happening?
Ooh! OOh! OOOh!!!!
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
What do you call a gorilla with no arms?
An ape-utee
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
Did you hear about the extremely serious gorilla?
He didn't monkey around.
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. Which country was founded by wild gorillas?
A. The Banana Republic.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
Where do gorillas keep their beehives?
Apeiaries.
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
What’s the first thing a gorilla learns in school? The ape b c’s.
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic? The bear hug!
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
A muslim woman wanted to adopt a gorilla. Her husband wouldn't allow it.
He said, that's haram, bae.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
What do you call a gorilla with a million dollars?
A gorillanaire
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
Q. Which kind of ape enjoys smoking tobaco?
A. Cigarilla.
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
How do you tell the difference between a rabbit and a gorilla?
A rabbit looks nothing like a gorilla
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
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