Two goats are married, living on a farm. Billy Goat says, "I really want children. Let's make some babies."
Betty Goat responds, "Heck no. No baby goats for me..."
"I'm not kidding."
Is a mountain goat a hillbilly?
Young goats should be careful when they're out and and about and shouldn't jump into a stranger's car.
That's how you get kidnapped.
What did the baby goat say to his father?
I kid you not.
What did the little goats say when they were caught playing a prank on the sheep?
Sorry, we were just kidding.
Why are goats from France musical?
Because they have French horns.
If a young goat learns a martial art, are they a karate kid?
Did you hear about the mother goat telling jokes?
She’s a real kidder.
What do you call a Spanish Goat with no hind legs?
Gracias
What’s a goat’s favorite TV show?
America’s Goat Talent.
Whatever floats your goat.
Is a goat that eats office supplies on a staple diet?
What do you call an immature goat?
A silly billy.
Who did the goats vote for as president?
Billy Clinton.
What's a goat's favorite organ?
A Kid-ney
What do you call a Spanish goat with no hind legs?
Gracias.
Do hairless goats wish they had mohair?
What do you call a goat who is in charge of a university?
Billy Dean.
What’s a goat’s favorite drink?
Goat-arade.
What do you call a lazy goat?
Billy Idle.
What do you call an outlaw goat?
Billy the Kid.
What kind of music do goats listen to?
Baaa-ch!
Why is it hard to carry on a conversation with a goat?
Because they are always butting in.
How do you keep a goat from charging?
You take his credit card away!
What do you call a royal goat wearing denim?
Billy Jean King.
What do goats eat?
Goatmeal.
A goat came out of nowhere and headbutted me
It was a ram-done act of violence
Who called it a goat petting zoo...
and not Close Encounters of the Herd Kind?
What did the goat farmer’s wife say to her husband when he was swearing on the job?
“Not in front of the kids!”
What do you call a goat that lip-syncs?
Billy Vanilli.
I just got an adorable baby goat, but it can’t bend its legs.
The vet said it’s a cute kid knee disorder.
What do you call a goat on a mountain?
Hillbilly.
What’s a goat’s favorite musical?
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dream Goat.
Did you hear the joke about the lumberjack, The sheep and the goat?
I wood tell ewe, but it’s a baaaaaad joke
If a goat grows a beard, is it a goatee?
Something’s goat to give.
What do you call a goat swimming in the sea?
Billy Ocean.
What did the goat say when he woke up on a train?
I have no idea how I goat here.
I told my parents I wanted to raise goats for a living, but I was only kidding.
For goat’s sake, that’s enough.
Why are goats and rhinos attracted to each other?
Because they are both horny animals.
What symbolizes a goat’s family tree?
A goat of arms.
Why was the farmer angry?
Because someone got his goat.
What does a goat call his girlfriend?
Bae.
You have goat to be kidding me.
Why did the ram run over the cliff edge?
Because he didn’t see the ewe turn.
What do mountain climbers share around the campfire?
Goat Stories!
I goat this.
What’s the definition of butter?
An angry goat.
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.
How long has this been going on?
Since I was a kid.
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