Why do fish like worms?
Fish like worms because they’re hooked on them.
Are Jellyfish sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish?
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
How do fish get from place to place while playing golf?
With a golf carp,
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
I went fly-fishing yesterday.
All I caught was two bluebottles.
How do you make an Octopus laugh?
With tentacles!
Where do fish wash?
In a river basin.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Fish take Vitamin Sea to stay healthy!
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
What kind of whale can fly?
A Pilot whale.
What would you call a jellyfish combat veteran?
A man o' war.
A detective recently came into town to visit the new sushi restaurant
He heard there was a fishy business.
How do shellfish get to the hospital?
In a clambulance!
What fish are at the zoo?
Lion fish!
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse?
The Codfather.
Why don’t fish play basketball?
Because they're afraid of the net.
Why do fish swim in schools?
Because they can't walk.
What did one fish say to the other?
If you keep your mouth closed you will not get caught.
How does a group of sea turtles make a decision?
They flipper a coin.
How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
Why is it easy to spot a Cinderella-fish? They have glass flippers!
What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air?
A seahorse.
How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed!
Do you know where you take a sick squid?
To the doctopus.
Would you rather kiss a shark or a jellyfish?
A jellyfish. That’s a no-brainer.
What do jellyfish and a girl after prom night have in common?
They can't be deboned.
What's a fish's favorite musical instrument?
A bass guitar.
Which sea creatures cry the most?
Whales!
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
What did the fish say when it swam into a brick wall?
Dam!
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of the school.
How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
Why did the girl pour glue into her fishbowl?
She wanted to make a fish stick!
Why was the whale so sad?
The fish was said because he was a Blue whale!
What kind of fish will help you hear?
A herring aid!
Why do you bring fish to a party?
You bring fish to a party because they go well with chips!
What do you call a fish that floats on the surface?
Bob.
How do fish go into business?
The start on a small scale.
There was a fight at the fish restaurant last night.
Two haddock got battered.
Which day do fish hate the most?
Fry-day.
What is a dolphin’s favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in a school.
Why are goldfish orange?
The water makes them rusty.
Why are fish so smart?
They are always in schools!
How do fish get high?
Seaweed.
What are the fastest fish in the river? The motor-pike with a side-carp!
Where do fish stay on a campsite?
Fish stay in tentacles while they are camping!
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
‘I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!’
What’s the difference between a marine biologist and a dog?
One tags a whale, the other wags a tail.
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