Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
Q. After the stripper is done, what happens at a stag party?
A. Deer-ty dancing.
What is the name of Santa’s rudest deer?
Rude-olph.
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What did the deer say after she saw her Amazon bill?
“I spent too much doe!”
Q. What did Ena say after Bambi was killed by a semi truck?
A. He will be dearly missed.
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
What type of bread do deers enjoy the most?
“Sour-doe!”
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
How much does it cost to fly Santa’s sleigh?
About 9 bucks.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What do you get when you cross a fawn with a bumblebee?
Bambee.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What does the father deer say to the mother deer to show his love?
“I love you deerly!”
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
Q. What is another name for elk diarrhea?
A. Chocolate Moose.
Q. Who walks around the suburbs trying to sell venison meat?
A. A deer-to-door salesmant.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
What did the large baby deer say when he met his favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn!”
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
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