What do you get when you cross a cow with a wolf?
An animal that mooed at the full moon.
In order to get an accurate count of the herd, the farmer uses a cow-culator.
What do cows sing at their friend’s birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo!"
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
Where do cows go on vacation?
Moo York.
You can always find the little cows eating lunch inside the calf-etiria.
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!
Why doesn’t Sweden export its cattle?
It wants to keep its Stockholm.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because all of the cows have horns
India is a very peaceful country.
Because nobody has any beef over there.
Angry cows are usually responsible for giving the farmer sour milk.
The reason the cow wore a bell around her neck was because her horn didn’t work anymore.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
What has four legs and goes Oom, Oom?
A cow walking backwards.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
A cowboy thought he had 100 cows but when he counted them there were only 97
So he rounded them up.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
I warned farmer Brown not to pamper that cow too much because it would wind up giving spoiled milk.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalfeinated.
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
Where do pigs learn about magic?
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
How do you make a milkshake?
Give a cow a pogo stick.
What’s the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper.
The story of the chicken and cow running away together sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
Why was the cow always exercising? To build up its moo-scles
What do you get when you cross a cow and an earthquake?
Milkshake.
What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?
Cowboom.
Why did the mother cow give the sleepy baby cow a hammer?
He wanted her to hit the hay.
How did the calf’s final exam turn out?
Grade A.
Where did the bull carry his stock-market report?
In his beef case
That romantic cow took his new girlfriend to the moo-vies.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
Where do cows get together?
The meet market.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
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