Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
Because it wanted to lay it on the line.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
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