Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
What do you call a bat with the flu?
An airborne disease.
Why did the bat fire a chauffeur?
He drove everyone batty.
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
Where do bats keep their money? The blood bank!
What happened if vampires came to a big dance?
A bat ball.
How do bats tell their future?
They read their horrors-cope.
How do bats tell their future? They read their horrorscope.
Where do bats keep their money?
The blood bank.
What does a vampire bat call a bloodmobile?
Meals on Wheels.
What did the baby mouse do when she saw a bat?
She ran home and told her mother she saw an angel
What do you call a bat with ebola? African batman.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
How do you hold a bat?
By the wings.
What did the bat say to the diabetic? Nice knawing you!
Why did the bat look for a job?
She was tired of hanging around.
Why did the cat want to learn to fly?
She wanted to try bats.
How fast can a cave become vacant? At the drop of a bat.
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
Why did the bat often use mouthwash? She had bat breath.
How do you write a book about Bats? With a ghostwriter.
What was the most famous bat comedy team?
Ab-bat and Costello.
What did the bat say to the friend who itched and squirmined?
Come back when you have washed out the virmin.
What do you call vampires bats that cheer at football games?
Bat-on-twirlers.
Why shouldn’t you drive with a vampire?
He will drive you batty.
What game do little bats like to play?
Batty fight.
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet?
Blood-thirsty hacker.
What do you call writing a book about breeding bats to pull carriages? A wheely bat idea.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet? blood-thirsty hacker baby
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
What bat was called an invader?
Bat-talina.
Where do bats go to gamble?
Bat-lantic City.
What is the first thing that bats learn at school? The alphabat.
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
How do bats line up in school?
In alpha-bat-ical order.
What praise did a bat’s friend deserve? A bat on the back.
What is a good place for bat jokes?
A public bat room.
Where do bats like to relax?
In the bat-tub.
What do bats say to those they dislike? Good riddance to bat rubbish!
Why did the bat break up with her girlfriend?
She thought she was a pain in the neck.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
How do bats spend their time?
Flying and hanging out.
When does a bat go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
What do you have to know to teach a bat tricks?
More than a bat.
What's a bats favorite desert? I-Scream!
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