What happened when the bat swallowed the alarm-clock?
She turned into a ding-bat.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet?
Blood-thirsty hacker.
What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
How do bats tell their future?
They read their horrors-cope.
What do you call vampires bats that cheer at football games?
Bat-on-twirlers.
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
Why did the cat want to learn to fly?
She wanted to try bats.
Where do bats like to relax?
In the bat-tub.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
What position did the young vampire bat play on the football team?
Quater-bat.
Which bat can hang the highest and longest?
The acro-bat.
When does a bat go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
Where do bats keep their money? The blood bank!
What was the most famous bat comedy team?
Ab-bat and Costello.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
How do bats tell their future? They read their horrorscope.
What bat was called an invader?
Bat-talina.
What did the grape say when the bat squished on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What game do little bats like to play?
Batty fight.
How do bats greet a friend?
With a sound wave.
What did the bat say to the friend who itched and squirmined?
Come back when you have washed out the virmin.
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
Why did the bat look for a job?
She was tired of hanging around.
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
Why did the bat break up with her girlfriend?
She thought she was a pain in the neck.
What does a vampire bat call a bloodmobile?
Meals on Wheels.
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
What did the baby mouse do when she saw a bat?
She ran home and told her mother she saw an angel
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
What do you call a bat with the flu?
An airborne disease.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
How do bats spend their time?
Flying and hanging out.
Why shouldn’t you drive with a vampire?
He will drive you batty.
What do you call an bat with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
How do you hold a bat?
By the wings.
Why did the vampire need mouthwash? Because he had bat breath.
What is a good place for bat jokes?
A public bat room.
How fast can a cave become vacant? At the drop of a bat.
Why did the bat walk in her pijamas to take a bath?
Because she did not have a bat robe.
What did the bat say when she was invited to dinner?
No, fangs. I just ate.
Why did the bat often use mouthwash? She had bat breath.
Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
Who were the original transformers? Vampire bats!
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
What’s a bats favorite desert?
I-Scream!
Why did the bat fire a chauffeur?
He drove everyone batty.
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