What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
What game do bats like to play with birds?
Bat-mington.
What’s a bats favorite desert?
I-Scream!
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
How do bats line up in school?
In alpha-bat-ical order.
How fast can a cave become vacant? At the drop of a bat.
Why did the bat break up with her girlfriend?
She thought she was a pain in the neck.
What do you have to know to teach a bat tricks?
More than a bat.
Why did the bat fire a chauffeur?
He drove everyone batty.
Why did the bat walk in her pijamas to take a bath?
Because she did not have a bat robe.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
What did the bat say to the friend who itched and squirmined?
Come back when you have washed out the virmin.
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
What happened when a bat misbehaved in night school?
She got suspended.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
Why did the bat often use mouthwash? She had bat breath.
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
What position did the young vampire bat play on the football team?
Quater-bat.
What did the bat say when she was invited to dinner?
No, fangs. I just ate.
Which bat can hang the highest and longest?
The acro-bat.
Why did the cat want to learn to fly?
She wanted to try bats.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a ball?
A home run.
Where do bats keep their money?
The blood bank.
How do you hold a bat?
By the wings.
When does a bat go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
What is a good place for bat jokes?
A public bat room.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet?
Blood-thirsty hacker.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet? blood-thirsty hacker baby
What did the bat do when she did not know the answer in class?
She winged it.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
What game do little bats like to play?
Batty fight.
What do you call a bat with the flu?
An airborne disease.
What happened when the bat swallowed the alarm-clock?
She turned into a ding-bat.
What do bats say to those they dislike? Good riddance to bat rubbish!
What happened if vampires came to a big dance?
A bat ball.
What praise did a bat’s friend deserve? A bat on the back.
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.
How do bats tell their future?
They read their horrors-cope.
Who were the original transformers? Vampire bats!
What do you call writing a book about breeding bats to pull carriages? A wheely bat idea.
What did the bat complain about?
Flying with such frequency was exhausting.
What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
What do you call a bat with ebola? African batman.
What was the most famous bat comedy team?
Ab-bat and Costello.
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
What did the bat say to the diabetic? Nice knawing you!
What is the first thing that bats learn at school? The alphabat.
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