What did one beached whale say to the other beached whale?
Long time no sea.
What’s the difference between a marine biologist and a dog?
One tags a whale, the other wags a tail.
How do whales make a decision?
They flipper coin.
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
Have you ever seen a fish cry?
No, but I’ve seen a whale blubber.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What do you call a group of whale musicians?
An orca-stra.
What’s an orca’s favorite TV show?
Whale Of Fortune.
The killer whale planned its attack on the seals for weeks.
It was very carefully orca-strated.
Whale, whale, whale …
If it isn’t a pod.
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
What’s a whale’s favorite movie?
The Humpback Of Notre Dame.
What’s a whale’s favorite meal?
Fish and ships.
What do whales like to chew?
Blubber gum.
What do polite whales always say?
You’re whale-come.
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
A License To Krill.
Which type of whale can fly?
Pilot whales.
Why can’t you screw with whales?
because they hump back.
Did you know that the blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court …
The game would be cancelled.
Why was the Whale bank heist so successful?
Because it was a whale orca-strated plan
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
How do you find out how heavy a whale is?
Take them to a whale-weigh station.
How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
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