What's the best way to stuff a turkey? Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream!
My wife has been giving me a hard time about my drinking. Eventually, I agreed to quit cold turkey.
Never cared for leftovers anyway.
What do you call a turkey's evil twin?
A Gobblegänger.
What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.
What sound does a space turkey make? Hubble, Hubble, Hubble!
What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son? If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
What sound does a turkey's phone make? Wing! Wing!
When is a turkey scary?
When it's a goblin.
What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus? Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving.
What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving? The turkey trot
What kind of turkey grows on a tree? Poultry.
Why did the Beatles stop inviting Ringo to Thanksgiving?
Because he wouldn't share the drumsticks.
Why did Jesus ask Judas to crave the turkey?
Beause he knows he likes stabbing others in the back.
What was the turkey suspected of? Fowl play.
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
What key has legs and can't open doors? A Turkey.
What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit? A poultrygeist!
What kind of key has no lock?
A turkey.
Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks
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