What do you call a lobster with a Christmas hat?
Santa Claws
What’s the difference between a greyhound station and a lobster with a boob job?
One’s a crusty bus-station, the other’s a busty crustacean.
What do you call a lobster that's afraid of tight spaces?
Claw-strophobic
Stopped by a roadside stand that said lobster tails $2. I paid my $2 and he said...
Once upon a time there was this lobster...
A lobster's favorite shot in tennis?
The lob.
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea-weed.
Have you seen my lobster?
I'm worried he might by a lost claws.
How does a lobster answer the phone?
"Shello?"
What do you get if you cross a lobster with a telephone?
A snappy talk.
Where does a lobster keep its clothes?
In the clawset!
Our lobster neighbors never give us gifts during the holidays!
They’re so shellfish.
What's the difference between a lobster and a Chinese man who's been run over by a bus?
Ones a crustaecian and the other is a crushed Asian.
The lobster is one shell of an animal.
What's worse than lobsters on your piano?
Crabs on your organ!
I met this really beautiful crustacean, but I lobst her number.
Just had Lobster Bisque for the first time!
It was souper good!
here do lobsters go to borrow money? The prawn broker.
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.
My lobster's name is:
Claude