My wife and I have been having trouble communicating. We decided to take a walk when we passed a farm. She said "awww, babe look at the sheep."
"No, ewe." I said.
I saw a sheep covered in plastic
It was lambinated.
What style of classical music do sheep most enjoy?
Baa-roque
Did you hear about the sheep's jousting tournament?
It was a real baa-lancing act.
Someone told me that it takes 5 sheep to make a sweater.
I didn't know they could knit!
What do you call a quiet sheep?
A shhhhhhh-eep.
I was riding my bike through the countryside when I was attacked by a herd of sheep!
Fortunately, I was only grazed.
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
My sheep-powered computer was starting to run slowly
So I added more ram
A sheep, an idiot, and a snake walk into a bar.
Baaaa dumb hisssssss.
My brother was trampled to death by a flock of sheep.
May he rest in fleece.
All the girls I meet keep thinking I’m a sheep.
Every time they see me they say “Ewe”
The sheep says to the shepherd "you're an jerk and I hate you!" and the shepherd says "Say what?"
And the sheep goes "You herd me!"
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
What sound do 8 sheep make?
Octo-bah.
Why don't you want to sleep in the sheep pen?
It would be total bedlam!!
What do you call a buffet for sheep?
All you can bleat!
A female sheep and a couple of aggressive birds are sitting on the veranda. What language do they speak?
Porchewegeese.
What do you get when you mix a sheep and a kangaroo
A wooly jumper
What is a grandma sheep called?
A baaaa-nana
Our local winery recently starting using a flock of sheep to keep the grass from getting too long.
At least that's what I herd through the grapevine.
How did the sheep farmer become best in his field?
Shear luck.
Why won't the dog listen to the farmer's sheep jokes?
He's herd them all.
What's a sheep's favorite art style?
Baa's Relief
I told my wife that I saw a sheep pondering its place in the world.
She asked me, “Can ewe even imagine?”
What do you get when you cross a bee and a sheep?
A bah-humbug.
I heard someone broke out of prison using a sheep
I didn’t believe it until I saw the news and he was on the lamb.
How do you measure the circumference of a Sheep?
Shepherds Pie
What kind of car does a sheep drive?
A LAMBorghini
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