What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
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