What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
Why don’t elephants use computers?
Because they’re afraid of the mouse.
What do you call a light-headed elephant?
An ele-faint.
Who do elephants get their Christmas presents from?
Elephanta Claus.
What do you call an elephant with rotors?
A Nellie-copter.
Elephants will toil all day, and they work for peanuts.
What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
What’s an elephant’s secret talent?
They’re great at multi-tusking.
What animals were last to leave the ark?
The elephants as they had to pack their trunks.
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
Eleph-ino! (Sounds like "Hell if I know!")
What’s an elephant’s favorite sport?
Squash.
Looking after more than one elephant at a time requires the ability to multi-tusk.
How do elephants bathe?
With their trunks on.
What do you call an elephant that’s never clean?
A smelly-phant.
What do you call a flying elephant?
A jumbo jet.
Why did the elephant ask to borrow a suitcase?
Because he only had a little trunk.
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
Hunting elephants is illegal as ivory well know.
I had a job circumcising elephants.
The base salary wasn't great, but the tips were huge.
Anything unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers?
Cinderella-phant.
What's the opposite of an elephant?
An eleph-antonym.
What do you call an elephant that never washes?
A smelly-phant.
Why did the elephant start the stampede?
Because it wanted to be herd.
What do you call an elephant with an aerial on his head?
An elephant-enna.
Hannibal crossed the Alps because it was safer than crossing the elephants.
What do you get when you cross two fish with two elephants?
A pair of swimming trunks.
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