What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
Because it wanted to lay it on the line.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
What do you call a group of chickens clucking in unison?
A Hensemble.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
What do you call the door to a chicken barn?
The hen-trance.
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