What do cherries say to their best friends? You are cherrific!
Why does a little cherry always look up to its parents? It tries to follow in their fruitsteps.
What does a lady in a mall do with a cheesey credit card? Go on a shopping brie.
Why have less scato when you can have mo’ scato?
Why did the orange become juice?
It couldn't handle the pressure.
What is a monster's favorite food? Ghoul scout cookies.
No one understands me when i say I like to paint peas in a cage.
I don’t what is so hard about it. I’m a trapped peas artist.
How can we tell the difference between a can of beef soup and a can of pork soup? Just read the labels.
What's a barista's favorite morning mantra? Rise and grind.
What did the Mama Hot Dog say to the little frankfurter? Ketch-up!
Eating no meat except fish is really bothersome.
I should stop being a Pesky-tarian.
What is the only thing that can cure a sick do-nut?
An antidought!
A major produce organization is reeling after multiple reports of tainted lettuce.
We may soon witness the falling of the Romaine Empire.
Why did the orange go to the doctor? He wasn’t peeling well.
"Be kind, re-wine."
Where does Thor grow his vegetables?
In his Asgarden.
So yesterday I saw a bottle of ketchup steal a bottle of mustard
'Twas saucepicious
Why does everyone want ice cream to be on their team?
Because with them, anything is popsicle.
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
A skeleton walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer and a mop.
There was a stampede out on the dairy farm. It was udder chaos.
"Sip, sip hooray."
Have you heard about the chocolate box thief? He’s always got a few Twix up his sleeve.
I’ve got a great idea for an automatic orange peeling machine I hope it bares fruit.
What do you get when you play Tug-of-War with a pig? Pulled-Pork
What do you call bananas that don't stick up for themselves? A bunch of pansies.
In life, the rule of thumb is, don’t bite more than you can chew unless it is chocolate.
What’s a donut’s favorite lullaby?
“Sprinkle, Sprinkle Little Star.”
How do you get a musician off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza.
So, how on earth did the police catch the watermelon thief without a solid description? Don’t really know; guess the bloke was acting seedy.
Whenever I feel like wining, I remind myself to put a cork in it.
We're like three peas in a pod, but lately I feel left out. It's making me quite unhap-pea.
If you can't beat them...
Just have your eggs fried.
Did you hear about the cow that committed murder? It was in cow-ld blood! How dairy.
What kind of candy never arrives on time? Chocolate
What happened to the renegade donuts?
They went down in a glaze of glory.
What did the Mexican heavy metal guitarist say to his bandmates?
“Rock out with your guac out.”
Why was the guy looking for fast food on his friend? Because his friend said dinner is on me.
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
What's the difference between a head of lettuce and a unicorn?
One is a funny beast, and the other is a bunny feast!
When do franks tell insults? At a wienie roast!
What do we call a chicken inside a hot tub? – It is called soup.
Why did the corn farmer go to jail?
He was stalking someone in a field.
How do the Vietnamese like their soup? Purrrrrfect.
If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make ? Slippers
What became of the pig who got fired from his job? He became canned ham.
So, what do you do with an epileptic watermelon? Simple, you make a seizure salad.
What's the most musical cut of chicken? The drumstick!
How do monkeys get down the stairs?
They slide down the banana-ster.
A strawberry will never help another strawberry because they tend to always get into jams.
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