An onion just told me a joke.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Why can't you tease egg whites?
Because they can't take a yolk.
What is the difference between a cow that produces normal milk and a cow that produces chocolate milk?
A mootation
How does bread win over friends?
“You can crust me.”
My wife doesn't like spicy food and I think it's a cayenne shame.
Did you hear about the guy who forgot to use the colander when making mac and cheese?
His wife gave him a restraining order.
When the orange started peeling, he was glad it was finally cutting some weight.
What's the difference between French fries and orange juice?
You can make orange juice out of orange, but not French fries out of French
Everyone needs to eat bread because loaf is what makes the world go round. Loaf truly is.
I love the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies They smell just like burned toast
American cherries generally do pretty well at high school. Many of them end up on the cherryleading squad.
What’s the best thing to put in a donut?
Your teeth.
What do donuts wear to weddings? Tuxe-doughs!
How do you keep bacon from curling in the pan?
You take away their little brooms
Here’s another one; what about an otter who lives in an emptied out melon? An ottermelon.
Q: What do you call two peas in a pod?
A: Peepee.
The forecast said that we’re in for a hot summer; better make sure I watermelon everyday or else the yard will dry up.
What was the Peach's favorite surf band from the 60's? The Peach Boys.
You had to use rennet to curdle the milk for making Ricotta, not lemon juice!
This is not the right whey.
"Wine a little, laugh a lot."
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus?
"mmmm"
What do you call real bacon?
Genuswine
What do you call an oriental cheese? Parm-asian
Did you hear about the man who quit his job at a bakery? They said that it left him loathe of bread.
Why did the pig kill the farmer? To save his own bacon.
How do you get a raise at the bread factory?
Butter up your boss.
Why did the slice of bread leave her boyfriend? She thought that he was just too knead-y.
"I need to re-wine my life."
I thought I'd have some evaporated milk on my pudding. But when I opened it, it was empty.
What do you get when you put the number 3.14 in the middle of the onions? You get o-pi-nions!
What is the greeting that Korean onions tell each other when they meet in the streets? They say 'Onion-Haseyo'.
Where did the spinach go to have a few drinks? The Salad Bar!
What's a baby gherkin's favorite TV channel?
Pickleodeon.
How did the baker cut four loaves of bread at the same time? By buying a four-loaf-cleaver.
Why did the cow and the bull become so close? Because they became beef-friends.
People who use sleeping bags in the woods are soft tacos for bears.
Q: Why could the fruits not see anything?
A: It was peach black there.
My mum makes the best soups. She is a real soup-erstar.
Have you ever seen the episode of VeggieTales directed by Tarantino?
It’s called Mango Unchained.
My wife's been on a banana diet.
She hasn't lost any weight, but you should see her climb trees now!
What do two cherries say when they get married? I promise to cherry-ish you forever.
What do you call bacon with salt on it
Salt and Peppa
What happens to Germans when they eat too many lemons?
They become sour krauts.
Why did the baker quit making donuts?
Because he was fed up with the hole business!
The plural of mango should be changed to mengo
I'm not too fond of not finishing my entire bowl of cereal. I think I have irritable bowl syndrome.
What did the father cantaloupe say to his son?
“Watermelon! (Water-my-lawn)”
Which venue did all the vegetables choose to open their fighting club in? An onion ring!
I think it’s funny when I ask girls whether they would spit or swallow my seed if I was a watermelon. Unfortunately, almost all of them reply not in a hundred melon years.
Know what kind of cookies rich people love? Fortune cookies.
Go to BabaMail
