What do two cherries say when they get married? I promise to cherry-ish you forever.
The national news did a story on my friend's bumper crop of green citrus fruits.
He loves being in the limelight.
They asked how the watermelon farmer felt after winning the lottery; clever bugger said he felt like a melon bucks.
What happens to a nervous nut?
It cracks.
Which type of wine only comes in a box?
Carbordeaux.
What did the cherry say when it won its third Olympic gold medal? That's just the cherry on top of a successful career.
What can you only drink in the Middle East? Dust-Tea.
I tried wild ox milk
Turns out I'm yak-tose intolerant
Mom, what do we have for dinner? I cannot tell you, son, it is a soup-rise! Is it soup? I soup-pose it would be.
I’m bacon you! Please stop with the meat puns!
Did you see the movie about the hot dog? It was an Oscar Wiener
One day, my stepfather ordered some fish tacos. I asked him what kind of fish goes in a fish taco.
He said, "Dead."
Potato puns are a-peeling.
How do you get a musician off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza.
Challah if you see me in the streets. Will do.
Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? To get chocolate milk.
What do you call a baker with a cold?
Coughee cake.
How do astronauts eat their ice cream? In floats!
What cookie makes you rich? A fortune cookie!
What made the baby cookie cry so loud? His mother was a wafer so long.
A chap goes to see the doctor with salt on one ear and pepper on the other. The doctor says, “You need to start eating more sensibly”.
Which mammal absolutely loves Merlot and Cabernet?
The Wineoceros.
How did the cheese get such curly hair?
It got a permasan.
Q: How do you make a blueberry?
A: You strangle a pea.
Astronauts can't open milk bottles in space. 'In space, no one can. Here, use cream'.
"What do tofu and a dildo have in common?" "They are both meat substitutes!"
A cable TV installer walks into a bar and orders a beer.
The bartender says, "You'll be served sometime between 7am and 2pm."
A pickle store is giving out their new tea-flavored pickles on the street today
I tried some and I guess they tasted quite a-tea-pickle.
Why did the pineapple’s phone die? It needed juice.
A protestor threw a bunch of spices on Jason "Pink" London, but all it did was leave him "Saged and Confused".
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
When I went to the shop to buy some strawberries, they didn't have any. It was such a fruitless trip.
I love you from my head tomato
Why did the squirrel ask for a pay raise?
He was paid peanuts.
Did you know there’s an app for corn growers?
It’s made in Sili-corn Valley!
What is the most affordable type of meat? Deer, it is always under a buck a pound.
What do they call Chris Christie in New Jersey? Cake Boss.
What’s the best thing about being a butcher? You get to meat the best people.
Why didn't the corn chip advocate wear shoes?
They believed in Fritos.
An artist painted a wonderful fruit painting. It was a beautiful peach of work.
Me and my sister used to be like peas in a pod, but recently she's become too snap-pea.
What do you call a cherry that is hard as nails? Tough as old fruits.
Why don’t these children eat their soup? Because all of them is stew-pid.
I like to roll peas from the top of a mountain. I always start at the peak.
What did baby clock ask mama clock? Where's father Thyme.
If you coriander into my tomato soup, you will give me a soup-herb dish.
What do you get when you use a cookie cutter shaped like a deer? Cookie doe!
What do you call two banana skins?
A pair of slippers.
Why did the banana go out with a prune?
Because he couldn't find a date.
What is a ghost pirate’s favorite kind of tea?
Boo tea!
Go to BabaMail
