“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
What happened when the butcher backed up into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work!
What do you call a pair of cornstalks that are best friends?
Ear buds!
How did the corn farmer get to be so successful?
He corn-ered the market!
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
Why did the cherry go to the good drinks factory? It was cordially invited.
Why does the Pope love Swiss cheese so much?
It’s hole-y.
I went to watch a play and there were so many peach errors in the dialogues.
Did you hear about the lowest grade of steak? It's where the rubber meats the road.
What do you get when you spill soup on a comic book? Souperman.
What do you call a healthy dinosaur? Tea-Rex.
Mom: *Struggling to make a decision between 1% or 2%.
Dad: Milk up your mind!
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
What do you call a strong pumpkin?
A Jacked-o-Lantern.
What is a dessert called with an extra chromosome?
A chocolate downie.
Q: Who is Peach’s favorite actor?
A: Brad Pit.
I don’t know who became more famous, Sir Francis Bacon or his son
Chris P. Bacon
I recently went to a soft fruit party, where all the food was berry based. It was cherrific.
Q: Why couldn’t the orange believe that her friend had let her down?
A: This was because citrus-ted him!
The healthy soup recipe was suggested to us by the nutritionist. It soup-erseded the old unhealthy creamy soup we used to have for dinner.
Why don't they make ice cream from breast milk? It's an udderly bad idea!
What do you call a very tall cherry blossom tree in Italy? The leaning flower of Pisa.
My brother gave me whole milk, but I can only have nut milk with my cereal. How dairy!
What do you call a depressed vegetable
Despairagus.
What do you call a group of men waiting for a haircut? A barbercue.
The peach was late for work because it had to make some pit stops on the way.
Why did the two slices of bread disappear in the middle of the night? They wanted to e-loaf together.
How is divorce like espresso? It's bitter and expensive.
When the little boy was baking a cake why did it run away? Because it said crack 2 eggs then beat it!
Love is also like a pineapple: They both are undefinable and sweet.
What did the pear say to the other pear when they just got together?
It’s good to be a pair.
Breakfasts with my family always feel like a party because they're always making toasts.
Why did the hare go to the taco truck?
He couldn't beat the tortas.
Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
What cheese surrounds a medieval castle? Moatzeralla
Pumpkin Spice and Everything Nice
Why didn't the two worms go into Noah's ark in an apple? Because everyone had to go in pairs !
Do you know what you call it when you place beef between two slices of bread? You get a bull-only sandwich.
I just had the most manly craft beer at my Israeli restaurant.
It was called He-Brew.
What do you get when you throw lettuce into the ocean?
I don't know lettuce sea.
What does a pizza say when it wants to cuddle?
Fold me close.
What kind of apple has a short temper? A crab apple.
Why did the kid keep falling off his bike? It had a banana seat.
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
I went to an English camping party with some vegetables. We stayed in a tea-pea.
What's red and has 7 dents in it?
Snow white's cherry!
Italians are so good at making coffee because they naturally like to espresso themselves.
What is the most affordable type of meat? Deer, it is always under a buck a pound.
Soft fruits make really supportive parents. Whenever their youngsters fail at something, they just smile and say “Have another bite at the cherry.”
What do you call Chewbacca when you have chocolate stuck in your hair?
chocolate chip wookiee.
Go to BabaMail
