What is the favorite punk band of onions? It is a band known as "Good Shallot"!
What do you call a hot dog race? Wiener takes all.
If a crocodile makes shoes, what can you make out of a banana?
Slippers!
When I was learning how to cook soups, my mum asked me to follow my instinct. She asked me to go with the pho.
What kind of cheese makes the best music?
Brieoncé.
Who is the funniest fruit around? Cherry Seinfeld.
What did the doughnut say to the pizza?
If I had as much dough as you, I wouldn’t be hanging around this hole.
The strawberry was very good at racing because he was always juiced up before a race.
What do you call referential cheese?
Feta.
It is really rare to find the most perfectly cooked steak.
This guy walks into the doctor's office with a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.
What do you call a nut on a Wheelchair?
“A busted nut.”
The farmer went nuts because he was told it’s more profitable that way compared to other crops.
When the chef asked me how I would like my soup, I said "I would like minestrone".
Worried about overcooking your onion?
Don't sweat it.
"Love the wine you're with."
Many people have puns, but they will nut tella you.
What did the ice cream cone write on his valentine card?
You make me melt.
What do you call it when a taco stands in your way ?
An obs-taco
What soup killed Rob Stark? Italian Wedding Massacre.
And speaking of meloncholy, I heard that’s what you get when you cross a watermelon and broccoli.
I dressed up as bacon for halloween.
To say the least, i was looking pretty CRISP.
A lettuce farm was busted by the FDA on suspicion of combining plant and human DNA to create a new protein hybrid.
When they dug up the grounds the found human romaines.
What is the most sophisticated class of bread?
The upper crust.
Walnuts are hard to crack open. It can take several mi-nuts.
Egg-Plant a kiss on me.
What do the peanuts and walnuts have in common? They are both nuts.
What are the best vegetables to sleep under?
a can of peas.
Ciabatta stay away from me because I don’t want naan of that. That’s one way to tell someone to keep away.
What kind of tea do wealthy people own?
Proper-Tea.
What did the ice-cream say to the unhappy birthday cake?
“What’s eating you?”
What do you call a cow that has 1 leg? Steak
I tried to make my own condiments but, the recipes change so fast, it's hard to ketchup.
What is a dessert called with an extra chromosome?
A chocolate downie.
Strawberries love delicious food. Their favorite is Jam-balaya.
Why did the aging bread roll retire?
Her career was already toast.
I saw a pun on chocolate bars but it wasn’t that fun
So I just snickered.
What is John Lennon's favorite donut? Strawberry' Filled Forever.'
What song was the peach listening to? 'Stronger with Peach Tear'.
What do you call two peas in a pod?
Peepee
When a man went to the doctor to get rid of the strawberry that was growing out of his head, the doctor told him, "Don't worry. I'll give you some cream for that".
What do you call it when vegetables have siblings?
Pumpkin.
The students were going nuts when they saw all the assignments due in the curri-kola-m.
Every girl is just like a pineapple: They both have many pointy defences, but they are still sweet and adorable.
What is a cannibal’s favorite cheese?
Limb-burger.
What is the smallest onion known as? It is known as an electronion.
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
What did the lovesick pig sing to his girlfriend? Don't go bacon my heart!
What does a dragon eat with his soup? Firecrackers.
Why don’t these children eat their soup? Because all of them is stew-pid.
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