What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate? A Candy Baa. Did you hear about the love affair between Mr. Goodbar and Peppermint Patty? They had a baby, Ruth.
What do you call a self-obsessed egg?
An eggomaniac.
What do you call an onion that keeps on jumping up and down? You call it a spring onion!
What do we call a scientist who specializes in pineapples? He might be called a pineappleologist!
I am a peach, and when my husband accompanies me, we are a pear.
The doctor advised I tried a milk bath. I asked if it needs to be pasteurized. No, just above the knees she replied.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
I'd tell you about a girl that eats nothing but vegetables,
but I'm sure you've herbivore.
Despite his puns being so orange-inal, nobody really likes them.
I'm on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.
Since her parents wanted to become wealthy fast, they ensured their daughter had an orange-d marriage.
Did you hear about the little grape who didn’t want to be made into wine?
Unfortunately, he was pressed into service!
Fake ramen noodles are also called the impasta.
What did the newspaper say to the ice cream? What's the scoop
Dad fertilized the garden with corn starch.
The plot thickens.
---
What do you call mountain climbing corn?
Mountain-ears.
Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? To get chocolate milk.
What did the farmer yell out when ducks invaded his dairy farm? Cheese and crackers!
Why shouldn’t you take corn on an airplane?
Your ears will pop!
When you cross a train engine with a strawberry tart, you make a puff pastry.
Why do gherkins giggle when you touch them?
They're pickle-ish.
Having pineapple on a pizza is quite like going down on a cousin: It might taste good, but something is not right.
What is a monkey's favorite cookie? Chocolate chimp!
Why does the Pope love Swiss cheese so much?
It’s hole-y.
What kind of cake do you get at a cafeteria?
A stomach-cake!
What's so special about twitter alphabet soup? It only has 140 letters.
I once had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of carbonated orange juice.
Thankfully it was just a fanta sea.
My wife asked me this morning "Do you want a bacon omelette?"
I said "No, I'd rather fry one."
I squeezed the innards of a pumpkin into a glass, and the result was just beautiful
In fact, it was gourdjuice.
I just hear that the woman who lives next door and loves fruit died. I hope she would rest in peach.
What do you call a single, solitary kernel of corn?
A unicorn!
The perfect name for a sad and morose strawberry is a blueberry.
What do fruit bowls say when they dress up as a ghost on Halloween? Be cherry afraid!
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
Dad Ordered Taco Bell
Asked how many Dillas come in their Ques 'a Dillas
I'm the pun King of Halloween.
Onions are great gymnasts as they have the advantage of swinging on the onion rings.
Who is the best kung fu vegetable?
Brocc lee.
What do dogs like to drink? Kit-Tea.
A crayon that looks like a strawberry is usually called a cranberry.
What did the burger meat say to the BBQ? “Is it meat you’re looking for?”
What do we get when we cross a Christmas tree with an apple? We will have a pine – apple!
In a romantic date, Romeo says to Juliette “Baby! You are the pineapple of my eyes!”
Why do bananas have to wear sunscreen?
Because they peel.
How do hot dogs greet each other? They say “give me some skin!”
What do you call it when you order the same donut every day?
A do-rut!
The walnut was not good at sports but did really well with his macadamia at school.
Why is Mrs Mayo mad at Mr Ketchup?
She caught him watching the salad dressing again.
Why does Elton John HATE lettuce?
Becuase he's a ROCKET MAN...
What sport are eggs best at?
Running.
How many French eggs do you need?
One egg is un oeuf.
Go to BabaMail
