What did the farmer yell out when ducks invaded his dairy farm? Cheese and crackers!
How is bacon like southern Europe?
It's got a lot of Greece in it.
“I only like lemons,”
Said Michael zestfully.
Q: Why did no one like peach’s personality?
A: Because it had a heart of stone.
My banana grandad got in an accident last year, he bruised like a peach!
What beer does everyone at the orphanage drink?
Foster's.
What kind of a key opens a banana? A monkey!
What did the vegetables say to the Salad Dressing? Lettuce all smile.
What would happen if pigs could fly? The price of bacon would go skyrocket.
Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? It said concentrate.
If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make ? Slippers
We all know that monkeys of all species love bananas, however, there is one family that doesn’t really fancy them, the orang-utans.
What do sophisticated fish drink? Salt-Tea.
What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk a basketball?
Michael Gourdan.
Why did Bill's friend get covered in beer?
Because William Shakes Beer.
A boy lines up to get some apple juice and a girl lines up to get some orange juice
This would be funny but there’s no punchline.
There was an announcement on the news the other day, we've finally achieved world peas.
Are you a vegan?
'Cause I yam.
Why did the hummus blush?
Because it saw a chickpea!
The farmer went nuts because he was told it’s more profitable that way compared to other crops.
The man next to her on the train spilled coffee all over her shirt. She responded by showing him dis-stain.
Nobody wants to sit next to the watermelon in the class because it has a strange smelon.
What is the only way one does not have to cry while cutting onions? They simply don't have to form emotional bonds with it.
Why did the ice cream truck break down? Because of the Rocky Road.
How did the coconut hit on the pineapple? It said ” you are the pina to my colada.”
The young loaf of bread ended up getting fired from his job because he kept loafing around. Poor guy.
What did Einstein say when someone tried to steal his beer?
Nein! Mine Stein!
Do you know what the favourite soup of a ghost is? It is the Scream of Broccoli.
What’s a balanced diet like?
A slice of cake in each hand!
The apple says to the pineapple “What? Go out with you tonight? It will not happen in a million years!” Since then, we have a crushed pineapple.
I got canned from a Orange juice factory...
Just couldn't concentrate.
What did the tortilla chip say to the avocado when the dip bowl was empty?
“We’ve hit guac bottom!”
What do citrus fruits use to get dates?
Pickup limes.
What do you call a very little cherry? Pit-iful.
How is ice cream as a girlfriend?
The sweetest.
Apparently there's a fruit that is naturally radioactive.
I think that's bananas!
"Sip, sip hooray."
What did the vegetables say to the Salad Dressing? Lettuce all smile.
All the other vegetables have always felt very emotional whenever they are near the onion.
What did one bread lover say to the other?
Before I break down and rye, I want you to know that I loaf you.
The young lady had to throw her toaster in the trash. She was diagnosed as black-toast intolerant.
I never count my chickens before they're hatched.
Because they're eggs.
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
Why do baby seals swim in salt water? Cause pepper water makes them sneeze.
What's red and has 7 dents in it?
Snow white's cherry!
An owner of a pizza shop has just been found dead covered with pineapple, ham, mushrooms, and pepperoni. Word is that he topped himself.
What soup killed Rob Stark? Italian Wedding Massacre.
Q: Why wouldn’t the teacher bring the class to the green pea farm?
A: It was in a seedy part of town.
When the strawberry's favorite song came on, he exclaimed "That's my jam!"
Pumpkin Spice and Everything Nice
Go to BabaMail
