What did the mother bread tell her baby roll? You really are the apple of my rye.
When you want to propose to a person who loves strawberries, just say, "I love you berry much."
When the peach lost her mother, it left a deep pit in her heart.
Q: How do you call a magic berry?
A: Cherry Potter.
In the last peach race, I put $30 peach way on two new racers.
A con artist tried to convince me he could ejaculate deli meat
What a load of bologna.
When is a vegetable also a nut?
When it’s a corn!
“I only like lemons,”
Said Michael zestfully.
My business that sells strawberry juice has gone into liquidation
“Mom, what do we have for this dinner?” – “I cannot tell you. It is a little soup-prise, son!”
What did the guest say when he arrived at the peanut butter’s dinner party?
“Nice spread!”
I used to sell loose onions
Until I got the sack
My friend exports the lilikoi fruit...
He says it’s his passion.
You may want to seek help if you feel despresso when you don't have coffee.
Saw a great offer on cheese in Tesco today!
It was buy one get one brie.
My son's has never really had much of an appetite.
But suddenly today he's eaten a dozen Kinder eggs whole.
He's full of surprises.
What did the judge say at the finale of the meat throwing competition? The steaks have never been higher!
Where does a pineapple and cucumber vacation? Somewhere tropical (tro-pickle).
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
A fruit was madly in love, it was peachy–keen.
Why was the girl staring at the carton of orange juice?
“It said concentrate.”
What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair? Chocolate Chip Wookiee.
What do you get when you cross a pickle with an alligator?
A crocodill.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
What do you call a flying cheese?
A curd of prey.
They were building a meat tower next door.
The steaks just kept getting higher.
What do you call a communist vegetable
a soviet onion.
How does a pineapple answer the phone? “Yel-low?”
Who does the nectarine just do a hair transplant? Because it wants to become a peach.
What does a posh salad shout before it's eaten?
KELP!
Why did the crazy man lose his job at the dairy factory? He was a danger to himself and udders.
What is a strawberry's favorite music band? Pearl Jam.
What do you call a group of nuts? A nut
The student asked the teacher, “Cashew a question?”, and the teacher replied, “Nut now”.
Cows don’t make very good cops. They refuse to go on steak outs.
What did mama bread say to her kids?
It’s way past your breadtime!
Why do pumpkins never quarrel? Because they have no stomach for fighting.
Why does Mr. Potato Head have a mobile?
In case Mr. Onion rings.
The jam bank went bankrupt because of the series of strobberies in the last quarter.
An onion just told me a joke.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I hear Jake finally broke up with his crazy grocer girlfriend; never could tell water problem was.
What happened to the pig who liked pineapple? He turned into a porky-pine!
What do you call fraudulent milk? Cow-nterfeit.
Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.
If you speak Hebrew and life gives you lemons...
You're an acidic Jew.
What type of person doesn’t like pizza?
A weir-dough.
Why did the coffee bean keep checking his watch? Because he was pressed for time.
Q: Why does the cherry have a hard time getting along with others?
A: It has crust issues.
A cup of coffee is the ideal start to a brew-tiful morning!
Made the mistake of offering my realtor some lipton iced tea
I forgot that he only drinks realty.
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