What’s the healthiest part of a donut?
The middle.
If you put your ear up to a Taco Shell
You can hear the Sí.
How do you know if milk is expired? The smell is dairy bad!
What was Valentine’s favorite dessert for the French cat?
Chocolate mousse
Which fruity singer was a judge on 'The X Factor'? Cherry Cole.
You've really struck a gourd with me...
My wife won't let me become a bean farmer. Why won't she just let me work in peas!
What's a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
What happened when the butcher backed up into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work!
All the other vegetables have always felt very emotional whenever they are near the onion.
What's a baby gherkin's favorite TV channel?
Pickleodeon.
I didn’t know you could vape a chocolate bar until my wife told me to stop inhaling them.
A peach biologist was looking for a peach-tree-dish for his upcoming experiment.
Strawberries are berry healthy. They pack a punch when it comes to beating cancer and other diseases.
What do citrus fruits use to get dates?
Pickup limes.
What did Gorgonzola say to Cheddar? Lookin' Sharp.
My friends say that I cannot cook alphabet soup for this dinner. And now they are eating their words.
How does Bob Marley like his donuts?
Wi’ jam in.
Americans were preparing peach gelatos, to demonstrate it's right to freeze peach!
Why did black chocolate cry over his wine glass?
Because it was his bitter half.
Did you know there’s an app for corn growers?
It’s made in Sili-corn Valley!
What happened to the zombie that made him visit the doctor? He had a crummy feeling.
Why will the fruits beat the vegetables?
They have a better punch!
A lettuce farm was busted by the FDA on suspicion of combining plant and human DNA to create a new protein hybrid.
When they dug up the grounds the found human romaines.
A cream-filled donut and an eclair decided to get a divorce.
It’s a sad story, but the real victims are their children. They’re in for a grueling custardy battle.
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
Who wrote the book "Great Egg-spectations"?
Charles Chickens.
What does a posh salad shout before it's eaten?
KELP!
What do you call a pig squished by sand? A ham sandwich.
What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair? Chocolate Chip Wookiee.
How is ice cream as a girlfriend?
The sweetest.
How do you kill a salad? You go for the carrot-id artery.
What do you calla watermelon that just won’t stop committing crimes? A watefelon.
Why do bananas wear suntan lotion? Because they peel!
What do you get when you use a cookie cutter shaped like a deer? Cookie doe!
What do you do if you see a blue banana? Try to cheer it up.
What did the ice-cream say to the unhappy birthday cake?
“What’s eating you?”
What do you say to an avocado who’s done a good job?
“Bravocado!”
It’s too bad that bread puns are always so crumby. Mmm . . . crumbs.
What do you get when you play Tug-of-War with a pig? Pulled-Pork
Why did the pineapple suddenly stop the car in the middle of the highway? Because it just ran out of juice.
I am really broth-taking when I see the signer vomiting soup.
What do you call really scared pasta?
Chicken noodles.
What kind of apple has a short temper? A crab apple.
Where do Eskimos keep their eggs?
In the egg-loo.
When is the peanut butter due to arrive?
In a Jif.
The squirrel’s chest got dirty with nuts, now it has a chest-nut.
A man went to his psychiatrist and complained that every time he drink coffee, he would get a stabbing pain in his right eye.
The psychiatrist said, “Well, have you tried taking the spoon out?”
"Be kind, re-wine."
Every girl is just like a pineapple: They both have many pointy defences, but they are still sweet and adorable.
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