I don’t want naan of that. Neither do I!
What did the glass of wine say to the beer?
Nothing... They barley knew each other.
What do you call a chicken staring at lettuce?
Chicken sees a salad.
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
Why did the man go into the pizza business?
He wanted to make some dough.
What do you call a pickle from the southern backwoods.
A hill-dilly.
What’s an apple’s favorite restaurant? Applebee’s.
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
The walnut got in trouble for pecan through the window.
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus?
"mmmm"
The easiest way to know that you are eating a bowl of rabbit soup is to take a look inside and find a hare in it.
What do sailors drink when they gather at a tavern to commiserate?
Port whine!
What do you get when you cross an orange with a parrot? A carrot.
How do you make a milkshake? Give a cow a pogo stick.
Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?
“It wanted to be a watermelon.”
What do you get when you cross a smurf and a cow?
Blue cheese.
What are pig criminals known for? Pigpockets.
I always tend to forget the french word for strawberry sometimes. But, then I eventually remember the fraise.
She'll take whatever beans necessary to get her daily cup of coffee. Whatever. Beans. Necessary.
What‘s an Italian’s favorite tea?
Spagettea!
The chickpea wrote a book, but he didn't release it until after his death. He wanted to do it post-hummusly.
I’m chocolate to my appointment!
What group of cheese has been known to fly? Curds of prey!
Q: What kind of desserts does a turkey like?
A: Peach gobbler.
Why didn't the butcher cross the road? He didn't want to brisket!
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
What do you drink with the Queen of England? Royal-Tea.
What did the Mexican heavy metal guitarist say to his bandmates?
“Rock out with your guac out.”
What kind of cake do you get at a cafeteria?
A stomach-cake!
What's a barista's favorite exercise at the gym? The French press.
So I was cleaning my spice cabinet...
and now I have a lot of thyme on my hands!
A cued peach visual communication system is used with people suffering from peach and hearing impairment.
Last night I dreamt I was swimming in a sea of oranges. I guess it was just a Fanta-sea!
What can you make with 6.02 x 10^23 avocados?
Guaca-mole.
Wondering about a peach's favorite movie? Well it has to be the 'King's Peach'.
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
What do you call an emotionally unstable peanut? Peanut brittle
How did the corn farmer get to be so successful?
He corn-ered the market!
Q: How do you make a blueberry?
A: You strangle a pea.
The forecast said that we’re in for a hot summer; better make sure I watermelon everyday or else the yard will dry up.
Which nut is worth the most?
A cash-ew.
Why was the burger sad after losing the race? Because the hotdog was the weiner.
Q: Why did the cherry stop in the middle of the road?
A: It ran out of juice.
What did Katy Perry drink when she was little? Bust-Tea.
Why did the giant use clouds to make pancakes? To make them light and fluffy.
Why do farmers make terrible comedians?
Their jokes are corny!
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad to see me?
Having chicken broth before the game was a sure shot way to maintain energy for the Soup-er Bowl.
What do you call a fat pumpkin?
A plumpkin!
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