A strawberry screamed at the other, "Were it not that ripe, we wouldn't have ended up in this jam."
What did the perverted pumpkin use for his pick-up line?
Hey gourd-geous! Wanna go back to my place and squash?
What is the most sophisticated class of bread?
The upper crust.
When I refused to have the soup, my sister said "People who do not have soup are stew-pid".
Q: What’s a nectarine?
A: A peach with balding problems.
Ladies, if he can't appreciate your fruit jokes, you need to let that mango.
Fake ramen noodles are also called the impasta.
Somebody was doing a speech and said, "This might be corny," and pulled out a couple of canned corns. Guess what happened next?
Total pundemonium.
Where do squirrels go for fun?
The acorn-ival.
The student asked the teacher, “Cashew a question?”, and the teacher replied, “Nut now”.
Good work, we’re raising your annual celery
I told my kids that ketchup can go on anything.
You know, It’s the least condiment denominator.
Why did the students eat their homework? Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake.
I just got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows and nuts I won’t lie, it was a Rocky Road.
When do franks tell insults? At a wienie roast!
What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”
Why did the monkey like the banana? Because it had appeal!
What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Doughnuts!
Wondering about a peach's favorite movie? Well it has to be the 'King's Peach'.
What do you call a chicken with a piece of lettuce in its eye? Chicken Caesar Salad
The strawberry went out with the grape only because he couldn't find a date.
How busy was the donuts day? It was jam packed!
When we spill soup on the comic book, we will get soup-erman.
A dog in a pumpkin patch is called...
a pumpkin pooch.
Predictive Text
It's the scurge of the hummus rice.
What do you call a nut with facial hair?
A mustachio.
"Time to wine down."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
What soup killed Rob Stark? Italian Wedding Massacre.
Some people like beer goggles. I prefer wine glasses.
How do astronauts eat their ice cream? In floats!
The tiny bag of flour got in trouble, so his mother sent him to bread early. He kneaded to be punished.
If my Hindu girlfriend thinks I'm going to eat Indian food, she has another think cumin.
What do elephants drink on vacation?
Peanut coladas.
Why was the guy looking for fast food on his friend? Because his friend said dinner is on me.
What did the boy bacon say to the girl bacon? Girl, you're bacon my heart melt.
Why did the orange lose his job at the factory? He didn’t concentrate.
Have you heard of the garlic diet? You don't lose much weight, but from a distance your friends think you look thinner!
The fruit started to stutter as it was suffering from peach deterioration.
It was the pie piper who had led the strawberries to the bakery.
What does a duck that’s made of avocado say?
Guac.
What’s a balanced diet like?
A slice of cake in each hand!
The strawberry was very good at racing because he was always juiced up before a race.
What is the name of the country near Iraq that is made entirely of cheese? Curd-istan
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
Did you hear about the pick-up artist who only ever wears green leaves on his head? Yeah, he’s definitely a pineapple smoothie.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
Why do we enjoy wine jokes?
Because they're de-vine!
Why was the peach so sad at the funeral? It left a deep pit in its heart.
What would Santa’s name be if he wore orange instead of red?
Fanta Claus.
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